It's totally normal to feel this way.
Why doesn't anyone tell us this!
Imagine if a woman was encouraged to reflect on her life at the time she became a mother.
How different might her experience be?
Mums often feel shocked at how huge the change is.
Because becoming a Mum is a shift that flows into all areas of your life.
You’re navigating physical, hormonal and emotional changes. But also social, cultural and economic factors too.
It’s profound which is why it can often feel overwhelming and confusing.
To avoid feeling like this Mums can empower themselves by choosing to consciously think about their "matrescence".
Matrescence is the radical identity shift a woman goes through as she becomes a mother. It helps you get to grips with who you are now you’re a mother.
As our children navigate each stage of their life we continue to navigate who we are as a mum and how to be a woman in our own right too.
It’s important to acknowledge that feeling out of sorts in it all sometimes is normal. It’s OK. It’s your matrescence.
I believe you set yourself up for success by being honest about what motherhood looks and feels like. That means being honest with yourself so that you can show yourself the love and kindness you deserve.
Because often it's not what we expected and that makes it feel really hard. But it's not your fault. It just takes time to work it all out.
By acknowledging our matrescence we can work it out and make sure we're looking after ourselves physically, mentally and emotionally.
And by being honest with those close to you they can support you too.
To reflect on and feel positive about your matrescence, grab yourself a cuppa and ask yourself these questions:
Is motherhood what I expected?
How has becoming a Mum affected me?
How am I feeling today?
Why do I feel this way?
What do I need and want right now?
How can I go about getting that/ making that happen?
How will getting that/ making that happen help me to give my best self for my family?
I hope by answering these questions you’ve worked out what you need to have more positive vibes and to feel really good in Motherhood right now.
If you would like help to think all this through, or if you think someone you know could benefit from this, do come along to my monthly Mama Cocoon reflection and relaxation evening.
It’s wonderful to sit and chat online and support each other through motherhood.
I hope to see you there.
All the best,
Rebecca