Motherhood is hard as well as amazing.
Please know that it is valid to feel that it is both.
You can feel so alone in it all.
It feels a lot because we care so much about whether we're doing a good enough job of it.
I still remember how it felt like such a huge responsibility was all on me in the early years.
So it's no surprise that many mothers wonder where the village is, that everyone says it takes, to raise a child.
And it's a valid question isn't it!
I mean how can anyone expect so much from us Mums.
We're just a single human being. And we have basic needs (eating, drinking, going to the loo and sleeping) that just don't all get met. So it's no wonder we struggle!
So if we aren't meant to do it all on our own, how do we find the right people to village with?
Firstly it's great to chat with your family and friends about how you are finding it all and what support you think you need to thrive rather than just survive.
But if these people aren't local or you don't feel able to confide in them then it's good to seek out more support.
My advice is to find out all about the in person and online ways of meeting with women who are at the same stage of motherhood as you
And further along in their motherhood journeys too.
Try a few out until you find the one or ones that suit you best.
Don't forget that this is about you and your baby both finding ways to socialise. So you may want to find something/s that are great for your baby and something that you really benefit from too.
They might be the same thing or something different.
Here's a list of local resources you can find in Wokingham, Berkshire and all over the UK.
Your health visitor may have the inside scoop on what Mums enjoy doing locally.
Be brave and ask other Mums that you see out and about. I did and it really worked out well for me. I'm still friends with them now.
Sure Start Children's Centres - click here to find yours They are government funded and give help and advice on child and family health, parenting, money, training and employment. Some centers also provide early learning and full day care for pre-school children.
Local coffee meet ups. Do a search online, check your local council website and seek out local churches and community centres locally. Here's a list of the Wokingham ones near me
NCT welcomes expectant and new parents and is run by volunteers and new parents. Here's the Wokingham page of events.
Our Baby Club, the Modern Antenatal Revolution. Informed, Informal, Inclusive classes with ZERO judgement. You'll feel supported and connected to your local network of friends and Birth & Parent Coach
mumsmeetup.com helps you find or start up your own group locally to you. It makes it simple to find and meet other mums in your area, similar by age of child and circumstances, within just a few clicks. Great for Mums of all ages.
The Mum Club, a community for strong, independent women, who happen to have children provide events and advice and information for Mums.
Wokingham Rocks is a fab directory for all the fun things to do as a family and a Mum - see if you have one for your area. Ours covers baby classes, school events, local walks and all the days out information you could ever need.
I've created what I craved and I now run the Mama Cocoon.
It's an online meet up with the idea being that we share our stories and explore what is happening in our lives with one another.
Being heard is so healing as is realising we aren't alone in them.
We have so much in common as mothers. There's huge value in the community spirit and connection. It feels so comforting and restorative to share our stories and listen to other women's too.
You’ll be able to connect and make friends with women who have faced similar challenges or obstacles as you and learn and grow alongside them.
The big benefits of joining the Mama Cocoon are:
You’ll feel heard
When living in such a fast-paced, increasingly digitized world, it can feel like nobody is ever listening. Everyone has their own lives to live and things to do, and it can be hard to find time to have really open, vulnerable conversations about what’s been on your mind especially when you have little ones to look after too.
Joining us in the Mama Cocoon allows you to speak up about what's been making you happy, sad, or frustrated lately. The women around you are there to listen, and your voice will be heard. Your story might resonate with members of your circle and spark a helpful conversation about an interesting topic, or might lead to the birth of a new friendship with someone in your group!
You’ll know you’re not alone
Life can be hard, and you can often feel like you’re on your own. These feelings of isolation and loneliness can seriously take a toll on your mental health, but joining a women’s circle can be a pleasant reminder of the fact that you are not alone!
Hearing about others’ thoughts and problems can help you be more forgiving to yourself and can boost your confidence and self-esteem. You’ll be reminded that you have people to talk to, and you don’t have to keep pushing forward all by yourself. These women are here to help and support you!
You’ll feel empowered
One of the biggest benefits of joining a women’s circle is that they exist to lift us up.
If you constantly feel tired and drained from the monotony of your daily routine, joining a women’s circle can be a great way to break out of the rut you may feel stuck in.
Being around women who listen and care about you can work wonders for your mindset. It can help transform your thinking and make you feel more hopeful and energized for your future!
You’ll be able to find yourself
If you feel like you’ve lost your sense of identity and aren’t sure who you are, a women’s circle is a wonderful way to explore yourself. You’ll be able to do a lot of self-reflection and discover what your true strengths, weaknesses, dreams, passions, and goals are.
It's so common to miss that person you used to be, motherhood is a becoming in which we bring some of who we were before with us but it takes time to evolve and work out who we are now we're a Mum as well as a woman in our own right too.
Verbalizing all of this helps us to be the best, brightest version of yourself possible!
"When women support women, incredible things happen"
I hope this helps you because when I became a Mum I was so surprised at how alone it made me feel. And so .........
I'd love to invite you to come and visit the Mama Cocoon for free
Click here to get all the information and to register
Once you've registered you'll get all the dates and the zoom link to join us.
We look forward to welcoming you.
Wishing you well on your motherhood journey,
P.S. Your first visit is FREE! But not for long as this will change in 2023.
So do come along as soon as you can. Register here